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horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Beware, you thrill-seeker, you. Your love of adventure is going to land you in the "Scariest Places on Earth." Ever think there's a reason no one's been in that house for a hundred years? Hmmmmm? We know there's no stopping you. Just don't let that famous Aries will get the best of you. Or it may be your last will and testament.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Stubborn -- oops, we mean determined -- Taurus is, well, determined to be first at everything. Sorry to break it to you, but you're not the first one on the block to have ghosts. Check out "Poltergeist" or "An American Haunting" if you don't believe us. By the way, if a little blonde girl tells you "they're heeeeere," run!

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Curious Gemini always checks under the bed for the "Boogeyman" and never finds him. Until now, that is. And let me tell you, he's not a nice guy. If your curiosity is getting the best of you, say "Beetlejuice" three times. What's the worst that could happen?

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

A safe, secure home is really important to Cancer. Well, we hate to break it to you, but "It" is going around. You know, Pennywise? It's this creature that can take any form, but it usually chooses the scariest thing you can think of. But look on the bright side: You've always wondered if positive affirmations really work. Give 'em a try.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Everyone knows your roar is worse than your bite. Wish we could say the same thing about the sisters of Alpha Nu. Or is it PED? Trouble is, we don't know which sorority is evil. They battle it out in "The Initiation of Sarah," and all we can say is, may the best -- and not the sacrificial-murdering-immortal-b**ches-from-the-underworld -- sorority win.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Look, we know it's almost impossible for super-organized Virgo to go into a house and not want to clean up. So believe us when we tell you to leave those cobwebs alone! And those crooked paintings? They're fine just the way they are. It's "The Haunted House," for crying out loud! It's supposed to look like that.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

How can we put this? Your love of balance? Yeah well forget it. 13 Nights of Halloween is here. There won't be time to do the laundry, sleep, or call your mother. It's all 13 Nights of Halloween all the time, my friend. Look at it this way, you'll be too scared to sleep anyway.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Scorpio lives for thrills, so you're just the sort of person they're looking for at Mystery Inc. Check out "Scooby Doo" and "Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed" to see what the gang is up to. Knowledge of ghost-ridding devices desired. Knowing how to drive a fan a plus. Bring a bag of Scooby snacks, and the job is yours.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

You're a seeker of truth, so maybe you can check out what's lurking in the woods surrounding "The Village." All we know is that whoever or whatever it is ain't happy. So put on that itchy brown robe and get moving. We'll leave the torch on for you.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

Capricorn, you're known for your courage. Good thing, because there are three wacky witches on the loose, making all sorts of trouble in "Hocus Pocus." Right now, the only thing trying to stop them is a 300-year-old cat, and he could use a little help. And cat treats. He could definitely use some cat treats.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

You're a free spirit who believes true love conquers all. Well then, maybe you think that a guy and a corpse can have a meaningful relationship. Hate to disagree, but just watch "Corpse Bride" to see what we mean. They just don't have enough in common. Like a pulse, for instance.

horrorscopes

what's your sign?

We love your dreamy quality, Pisces. But how can we break this to you? It's going to get a little nightmary. The original "Initiation of Sarah" is back, and that means all the screaming, clawing, and back-stabbing -- otherwise known as sorority rush week -- is back too. Go Greek!